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Nomzamo Mbatha has irreparable heartbreak

Actress Nomzamo Mbatha has once again sparked awareness on mental health, opening up about losing her cousin Carla.

In a moving Instagram post this week, as part of US music executive Shanti Das’ Silence the Shame mental wellness campaign, Nomzamo said she had experienced many tragedies in her life but the death of Carla was a heartbreak that has lived with her ever since.

“It is a heartbreak that I will never fully recover from but will always be in the process of healing from.”

The former Isibaya actress said she felt guilt and shame after Carla’s death and questioned what more she could have done.

“I felt guilt and shame. Was I not good enough for her to live for? Was I a good sister? What signs did I miss? Why did I get on that flight the night before because if I was home the next morning she wouldn’t have gotten the chance to execute her plan.”

Nomzamo explained she turned all her misery into the understanding that Carla was at peace.

“I then turned my fear and heartbreak into love. To understand better about her experience and suffering. She succumbed to her illness and that she is at peace and is free from the pain of this world.

“That she knew I loved her … that my family loved her, her friends loved her.”

View this post on Instagram

This is for you my ninja @carla_hd . I have experienced many tragedies in my life. But the one that sucker punched me was finding my baby sister in our family garden after she had taken her own life… it is a heartbreak that I will never fully recover from but will always be in the process of healing from. I felt guilt and shame. Was I not good enough for her to live for, was I a good sister, what signs did I miss… why did I get on that flight the night before because if I was home the next morning she wouldn’t have gotten the chance to execute her plan. I then turned my fear and heartbreak into love. To understand better about her experience and suffering. That She succumbed to her illness and that she is at peace and is free from the pain of this world. That she knew I loved her. That my family loved her. That her friends loved her. So @shantidas404 thank you for allowing me and so many others who have been so close to the epicenter of tragedy to Silence the Shame and give many permission to know that they are not alone. There is no shame. ♥️ There is LOVE . #SilenceTheShame #MentalHealth

A post shared by Nomzamo Mbatha (@nomzamo_m) on

This is not the first time that Nomzamo has remembered her “baby sister”. In 2018, she shared a moving tribute Carla vowing to forever carry her in her heart.

“Sometimes the sun does set and never rises again. Sometimes our hearts do break and never un-break. And every day we carry the burden of loss hoping that one day … all will be well again. Missing the smell of her hair and the sound of her laughter. Tonight, our memories cradle me to sleep.”

-Times Live

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